FUCKBOY
The Wall Street Baby
Every trade pays 1% in GME stock tokens — straight to holders, pro rata. No claim. No staking. No homework.
He can't read. He can hold.
The tape doesn't lie
Read straight off Robinhood Chain and the open market. Nothing here is typed in by hand. If a number is unknown it shows a dash, because a made-up number is worse than no number.
STATUS: not launched. Panel goes live with the contract.
No countdown here on purpose. Payouts fire when the vault fills, not on a clock — so we show you when the last one landed instead of pretending we know the next one.
Three steps. He mastered them before walking.
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01
Somebody trades
They always do. The people are not okay. Every buy and every sell on $FUCKBOY pays a 1% fee, charged in GME stock tokens.
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02
The vault fills
That 1% lands in the token's own vault and sits there getting heavier. Nobody has to press anything. The baby is asleep. The vault is not.
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03
Holders get paid
It goes out to holders, pro rata, in GME. The liquidity pool is excluded — it's a contract, not a person, and it has never held a bag in its life.
You don't claim anything. There's no staking page, no lock-up, no seventeen-step airdrop quest, no Discord role called verified-ape-tier-3. You hold the token. The GME shows up. That's the whole product.
He was born on the floor.
Not in a hospital. On the floor.
Somewhere in the golden age of meme stocks — between a margin call and a moon mission — a baby in a green pinstripe suit crawled out from under a trading desk, found a pair of sunglasses in a bin, put them on, and refused to sell.
Nobody fed him. Nobody taught him. The prevailing theory is that this is precisely why it worked. He never learned what a P/E ratio was, so it never scared him. He couldn't read the news, so the news couldn't reach him. Analysts went on television and said words. He blinked slowly at the screen and did not move his hands.
They tried everything. They downgraded him. They wrote him up as a cautionary tale. A man in a very good suit went on CNBC and called him "a symptom." He was in a high chair at the time. He did not respond. He has never responded to anything, which is the single most profitable personality trait in the history of markets.
Everyone else got a nickname. He got a ticker.
Years passed. The floor got quiet, then loud, then quiet again. The people who laughed moved on to laughing at other things. And the baby just kept accumulating, one nap at a time, in a suit that has fit him perfectly since day one and always will, because he is a cartoon and cartoons do not grow.
Now he's back, and he's doing the one thing nobody expected from a baby: paying people. Every single trade, 1%, in the exact stock that started the whole beautiful mess. Not because anyone made him. Because it's funnier this way.
He can't read.
He can't drive.
He can't tell you what a bond is.
He can hold.
Short enough to read in a high chair
How to get the bag
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01 Get an EVM wallet
MetaMask or Rabby. Both free, both fine. If you already have one from the last cycle, blow the dust off it and try not to look at your old positions on the way past.
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02 Add Robinhood Chain
One button. It asks your wallet to add chain ID 4663. Your wallet will show you exactly what it's adding, because your wallet is more responsible than most people in this industry.
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03 Get some GME
The GME stock token is what $FUCKBOY trades against, and it's what the fees pay out in. You'll need a bit of it to buy with. It trades on Robinhood Chain.
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04 Swap for $FUCKBOY
Trade your GME for $FUCKBOY on the launchpad. Then close the tab. Genuinely. Go outside. The vault works whether or not you are staring at it, which is more than can be said for you.
We will never ask for your seed phrase or private key. Neither will anyone legitimate, ever, for any reason. There is no form on this website that asks for one and there never will be. If a baby in sunglasses slides into your DMs asking for twelve words — that is not our baby.
Evidence
A working record of a baby who has never once been right on purpose.
Archive loading — drop files into assets/gallery/.
No dates. He can't tell time.
Launch. The chart exists. The baby has a chart. Somewhere a candle turns green and four people scream.
Holders arrive. Memes multiply beyond our ability to file them. The group chat becomes legally unmanageable.
First GME lands in holder wallets. Somebody posts a screenshot of $2.31 like it's a Ferrari. Honestly? Correct behaviour.
Tier 1 KOLs. The big accounts with the small attention spans. Anything paid gets disclosed as paid — that part isn't a bit.
CoinMarketCap and CoinGecko applications go in. Somewhere an analyst has to look at a baby in sunglasses and formally decide what he is. Godspeed.
Centralised exchange listings — Gate and the rest of the room. We can knock. We can't let ourselves in.
Something goes up. Something goes down. He does not flinch, because he is a drawing and flinching is not in the file.
Undisclosed. He knows. He's not telling. He communicates exclusively through sunglasses.
No price targets on this page. Not one. You're welcome.
Listings are decided by the aggregators and exchanges themselves, not by us. Everything above is what we're going for, not something anyone has agreed to. Nobody named here is affiliated with this project.